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Humor: Vegetarians Are Killers

Mass Murder At The Dinner Table! Carrots Have Feelings,


As a life-long meat eater, I confess that I'm disgusted and shamed by eating habits that lead to the brutal deaths of so many of God's gentle, living things.

I am sickened by the fact that there are millions of people who don't care, and who even feel a moral superiority about the fact that their dietary practices sustain an industry of systematic mass murder.

Carrots are eaten while still alive.

I shudder to think that there is a growing culture of ghouls who happily eat babies, fetuses, sex organs, severed heads and mangled appendages, and who cause pain, disfigurement and death to a degree that would shock even a sicko like Adolph Hitler.

They are a culture of smug, arrogant murderers who portray their agenda of wholesale slaughter as the epitome of virtue.

These murderers are vegetarians.

Every year, billions of living plants are killed, disfigured, abused, beheaded, pillaged of offspring and otherwise brutalized in order to satisfy vegetarians' cravings for roughage and a lifestyle that makes them feel superior to others.

It's true . Anyone with the slightest understanding of agriculture knows that many plants are killed when harvested. Others have their fruits, which contain potential offspring, hideously ripped off their bodies.

But you'll never hear about this from vegetarians. All you get from them is self-righteous blather about how they can't eat meat because their overburdened consciences won't let them participate in a ritual that leads to the death of animals.

Veggies constantly try to make meat eaters feel guilty about killing cattle. Apparently though, their consciences don't throb over the murder of plants.

That's because the carrot-heads are the stupidest, most arrogant and hypocritical phonies ever. They're too dumb to understand that plants suffer and are killed in order to feed them.

So let's go through it, rutabaga killers.

Enjoying that salad? If it's made with iceberg, romaine, escarole or even succulent bibb lettuce, you're eating the beheaded portion of the plant. The legacy of your passion for leaves? Vast killing fields littered with the remains of millions of stumped, headless, formerly living things.

When a lettuce head is chopped off, a white, milk-like liquid seeps from the severed head and the plant stem. Call it plant juice, or whatever. It's plant blood. And that brown stump on the bottom of the lettuce head is the slice wound scabbed over.

Other plants that are decapitated en masse so veggies can scold others: cabbage, broccoli, cauliflower and celery. Cabbage and broccoli will live after their heads are chopped off. But they will sprout lots of tiny, new heads, making them look like mutated freaks.

Studies have proved that tomato plants scream when their scarlet fruits are ripped from their bodies. I've never heard a nasal-voiced veggie deplore such abuse. Ripe tomatoes contain scores of mature seeds. A plant seed is a self-contained plant fetus. Give it some water, sun and warm air and it'll grow. Billions of plant fetuses are gobbled daily by veggies in an unprecedented massacre of innocents.

Many vegetables are immature when torn from plants. They are, in effect, babies or children. Many simply wouldn't taste good if allowed to ripen or grow to adults. That makes veggies baby and child eaters. The carnage is appalling!

How about the cherished carrot that so many of today's self-righteous murderers chew on? They're ripped out of the ground while alive, and basically eaten alive. Others that suffer a similar fate: radishes, potatoes, turnips, parsnips, beets and green onions.

Consider the prized asparagus. These firm shafts are sliced off of the plants with sharp blades. But if left to grow, they would produce a feather-like plant with thousands of seeds. The shafts contain sex organs.

How many stalks of wheat give their lives for a loaf of whole-grain bread?

Next time a vegetarian nags you with a tirade about being a killer for eating meat, reply that they're the greatest mass murderers ever. And tell them on other thing:

That Adolph is smiling up at them.

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I've been a reporter, writer and editor for 37 years. I'm dedicated to honest, fair and hard-hitting reporting. I'm not conservative or liberal, but am just a reporter who tries to get to the truth at any given point in time. I don't believe in pulling punches or being a lap dog because that serves no one. A free and aggressive press is essential to human liberty. That's why the Founding Fathers put a free press in the Constitution. So on this site you'll get a variety of news, fearless opinion, analysis, humor, satire and commentary. It's kind of like a free-for-all. My motto is "Without fear and without favor."  But good journalism takes time and money, so I hope you will contribute what you can to these efforts by clicking on the "Donate" button above. I could use your help. Thanks, Dennis Domrzalski.

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